that kind of a day.
those of you who know inga know that there are a few things i can't stand, things that make me weak in the knees and cause me to run for cover. one of those things: people brushing their teeth. ever since the fifth-grade slumber party at loreli's house, when, in a bathroom full of girls primping, loreli brushed and brushed and brushed and then, rather than spitting and rinsing like the rest of us, proceeded to swallow all the gunk in her mouth, a move i am sure was her springboard to popularity in high school. to this day, i can't be around anyone brushing teeth - not even the beaus i've loved and lived with.
the second thing that completely grosses me out is people eating cereal in milk. the dribbly milk, the double-dipping, the soggy cereal? ick. and, yes, i know these are weird, but i'll get my help, okay? the point is - gross.
so this weekend i was sick. sick with the flu in bed sick. i'm feeling a bit better today, thank you very much, and found myself needing to bop across campus this morning. why drive, i thought, eyeing my prime front row spot. i'll take the bus. feeling better, see? so the bus pulls up. i get on. it's pretty empty. my meeting across campus is only four stops away. by stop three, the bus is fully loaded. a girl sits next to me, styrofoam cup in hand. oh, coffee, i think, envious. huh, coffee with a spoon?
uh, no. lucky charms and milk. which the girl proceeds to eat the entire stretch between stop three and stop four, a stretch that includes a rather long traffic light. and lots of foot traffic the busses need to slow down for. so there i was, the smell of damp colored marshmallows wafting toward me, milk dribbling back into the cup, a couple of under- classman bottoms (and not even the cute ones!) inches from my face.
inga is no longer feeling better.
and, uh, did anyone really believe stella when she proclaimed, "I'll have lots of time to blog while I'm in Japan!" really?
the second thing that completely grosses me out is people eating cereal in milk. the dribbly milk, the double-dipping, the soggy cereal? ick. and, yes, i know these are weird, but i'll get my help, okay? the point is - gross.
so this weekend i was sick. sick with the flu in bed sick. i'm feeling a bit better today, thank you very much, and found myself needing to bop across campus this morning. why drive, i thought, eyeing my prime front row spot. i'll take the bus. feeling better, see? so the bus pulls up. i get on. it's pretty empty. my meeting across campus is only four stops away. by stop three, the bus is fully loaded. a girl sits next to me, styrofoam cup in hand. oh, coffee, i think, envious. huh, coffee with a spoon?
uh, no. lucky charms and milk. which the girl proceeds to eat the entire stretch between stop three and stop four, a stretch that includes a rather long traffic light. and lots of foot traffic the busses need to slow down for. so there i was, the smell of damp colored marshmallows wafting toward me, milk dribbling back into the cup, a couple of under- classman bottoms (and not even the cute ones!) inches from my face.
inga is no longer feeling better.
and, uh, did anyone really believe stella when she proclaimed, "I'll have lots of time to blog while I'm in Japan!" really?
posted by lynda at 1:14 PM
5 Comments:
I knew a girl who was a strict vegetarian named Jess. She was a guest in my parents' house while she and my friend Xander from Manitoba got their poo in a pile about a boating trip they were going to take from Ft Lauderdale to somewhere in Central America to pick up another boat for transport. She, for 4 gross days in a row, ate her cereal with apple juice.
No lie.
okay, that's just foul. apple juice? vegetarians are sometimes as odd as the vegans. here's one of stella's favorite stories about Vegan #2 in Inga's list (of, well, 2) vegans she dated. this might be partly why i'm banned from dating boys w/ vowel names or 'vegan' on their vitas.
Scene: the kitchen
Players: Inga, Vegan #2, and Stella
Context: talking about food
Inga, explaining why she can never become a vegan: jeez, i sure would miss the cheese, I\i mean, i love cheese
Vegan #2: sure, i miss cheese. i liked cheese, but if you take some soy-like-protein-dried-out [narrative interruption - i forget what he said it was - a mind block? perhaps] and put in on bread with some vegan-spread, it kind of sort of tastes like a grilled cheese. it's yummy [yes, he did say yummy - but, hey, he cooed to the cat, too].
dead silence.
stella: shit, you haven't tasted food in 10 years and you're trying to convince me soy protein tastes good? uh, no.
i bet it does - mixed with apple juice.
At the college my brother works for, they had not long ago a student who, for reasons I can't recall, lacked the sense of taste.
Hence, he ate solely for nutrition and, we think, texture. For example, he might mix peas and jello. It just happened that way.
-cK
My husband Ray says that tofu is of the Devil. His rationale is that anything that "feeds" off the taste of other foods, yet has no taste of its own, has to be Satanic.
And absolutely I would miss the cheese.
oh, jello and peas? wow. this posting is so grossing me out. wait til you click the word parasite in the new post above. yuck.
my brother's ex-wife (the bad brother, as it were) and her family used to put ketchup on everything. EVERYTHING. my parents, the good brother, and i spent one - JUST ONE - holiday with them and then called it quits.
Post a Comment
<< Home